Everything seems awful

i broke up with my wife and i m hallucinating that she will date with my best friends.for now nothing happened but since i m together with her since 18 years old this feeling kicking my butt hard.i love her.i really loved her.but nowadays everything going downhill to me.i m trying to find another girl friends that i date when i m 18 years old at insta and face but no luck.i m sure all of them married with children.i m 44 years old life kicking my butt like no tomorrows..uck this life

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Do you feel depressed?

yes pretty much.not like depressed i m using ad but i exhausted from everything.its shitty thing

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I also feel exhausted and I take big dose of ad

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i m taking 20 mg cipralex which is highest dose

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I was taking 75mg effexor.

Then 150.

Then 300.

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