It seems like I’m going into a depression again after the psychosis episode I had two nights ago. Because I’ve lost interest in reading and I’m restless and just want to pace or lie on the bed. I don’t know if it’s the after effects of the psychosis or if it’s just that I switched from one to the other.
It seems like each time I relapse I go through a period of psychosis followed by a period of depression then back to psychosis and then back to depression. Then get better. It’s usually either one or the other prominently. But I do get both at same time too.
I’m always the same according to my family. Many years ago I was diagnosed bipolar but my family never agreed with it after reading what it was. They agree with the schizoaffective depressive type diagnosis.
I was also once diagnosed bipolar but they changed diagnosis to schizoaffective depressive type which more accurately describes my illness because my high moods I thought were hypomania weren’t long enough and didn’t meet criteria of four days. When I get high moods I only get them for a few hours and with psychosis (which doesn’t fit hypomania).
I saw online there’s rapid cycling which means four cycles of mania and depression within one year, and there’s ultra rapid cycling which is a cycle every few days. There’s something like RCBD (rapid cycling bipolar disorder) but it’s not a formal diagnosis in DSM manual
My first diagnosis was schizoaffective depressive type, now they don’t know which box I fit in. Depression is for me the worst symptom of schizophrenia. I have tried all antidepressants out there, and the only thing that worked was a MAO-inhibitor but only for three years, then it stopped working.
Now i’m trying to adjust to my depression, not expecting too much and not putting pressure on myself, and it has actually helped a bit.
I wish for you that you can avoid depression or that it passes fast.
