I was just thinking this morning about how much sz/ocd has effected my life negatively. I realize only some stuff remains after they tore through my life.
I hope to regain some of it in the future but mental ilness if youre not carful can take everything.
What still remains for you guys?
I’m still here. I may be different, but I’m here all the same. Plus, I’m blessed to have my family.
I’ve rebuilt a lot. It takes time and for me it took a lot of isolation. Isolation shrinks you, but sometimes it’s necessary if you’re just delusional in the context of society.
Do you abuse substances? It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it, but that was a big problem for me.
Not any more. I use to use thc edibles but that didn’t last long. I definitely prefer to be sober.
Honestly man…. Idk why its happening this way. All i know is the mental ilness or whatever is really changing my personality. Feel like im not just crazy but more evil than I was before…
Hoping meditation and exposure therapy eventually help along with meds
Im not religious..I just meant my intrusive thoughts make me feel like a worse person. I dont really think im evil. I have some issues but not to the point of evil.
Its all good man.. I know we all have to deal with the MH stuff. I just hope I can recover some of my life one day 
Philosophers believe Buddhism is the best way to live one’s life. It’s really a non religion. It doesn’t believe in a creator. It doesn’t work on faith. It just deals with you in this moment and your suffering. I think it’s cool that you do eastern studies. I was into krishnamurti and all those guys in my youth.
Maybe look into meher baba I just got a book about him
…I think someone is targeting me with flags but whatever
I will check him out. I do alot of reading of thich nhat hanh. Really have influence my thinking more than anyone else ive read.
Also..be careful bro. The forum would not be the same without you..fr so dont let them start in on you again…. BS man
Much love, signless
Im still alive breathing walking talking greatful for that things
Have any of y’all read Confucius (Kung Fuzi) or Lao Tzu (Laozi)? Really good non-religious philosophy-type reads. My sister prefers one, but I prefer the other. We have interesting conversations about their philosophies and what we read. Both are very wise and have many good words to live by.
You’re not evil dude it’s just intrusive thoughts.
Thanks man… I guess the fact that I hate the thoughts means maybe the bigger part of me doesn’t actually feel that way…idk.
Im just glad nobody can hear them lol…I would be executed
Aren’t intrusive thoughts a symptom of OCD? I think you said you had OCD. I’m sorry you’re suffering with them .
Intrusive thoughts are the worst
Don’t let it get you down
Do you have a therapist?
I highly recommend communicating with a therapist.
Yea.. I think some are intrusive thoughts and some automatically negative thoughts (ants). I think my thought broadcasting and abuse delusion had a baby lol anger and pain + thinking people can hear everything…
Its better than it use to be but the content is really toxic and makes it really hard to separate from.
Hey bro ..yea ive been in therapy for a while now. That and books on self compassion and mindfulness have made it easier but its still pretty humiliating with the thought broadcasting stuff…
I just started luvox for ocd @everhopeful and I think ita making a small difference. Full effext takes 6- 12 weeks i think
Good luck man! Your in my prayers fr