A child hood of eating craft dinner and hot dogs 5 or 6 days a week. Going to school in dirty clothes and the teacher asking the kids if they could put a item from there lunch on my desk no hot water or toilet paper.. or getting kicked out of 3 schools in 3 months.. being raised by my mom cranking music til 4 am drunk.. ending up in social services. My past was horrible.. I hate how it is now.. can anyone relate? I feel like I been in a coma for 30 years
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Yeah. Physical and sexual abuse. Poverty. Food and shelter insecurity. Always feeling like the pariah in school. Behavioral issues between poverty/abuse/autism. Things got a lot better after I sobeerd up.
I don’t like talking about my childhood. Done my best to unpack the baggage but it’s the kind of thing you never completely resolve.
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Im just having a crappy day. Sz sucks
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Yes i relate. I was abused and neglected starting in infancy. For example, I was tied down to my crib with my head set straight as an infant. As a toddler I was left in a high chair sun up to sun down without toys. I was sexually abused from toddler years on…. The list goes on and on. I’m sorry you suffered too
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I feel your pain, homie.
I grew up around a lot of domestic violence, crappy apartments with huge roaches and pest, and food insecurity a lot of the times. When we moved to a new state when I was in high school we moved to the sticks and kids asked why I wore baggy pants. I was from California and assumed everyone dressed like that. In high school I had a lot of problems with depression and alienation, then mixed with trying drugs and alcohol at a very young age. Yes, we’ve had the Blues.
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My childhood was ok i guess. My brother tormented me, my dad was angry and stupid, my mom was really nasty and angry too. My sister was not a problem. Grew up lower middle class economically, but working class, always had somewhat ok food and stuff materially. No sexual abuse but somephysical and emotional abuse. There was something not right about my functioning growing up, and by 17 I was psychotic.
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Being invisible, never feeling alive. I grew up OK, I literally didn’t talk to anybody at school, kept to myself. Luckily never bullied at school but bullied in my neighborhood. Was weird as a kid, still am. I’m paying for all my sins now at age 64.
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I have such complicated and conflicting emotions about my parents. If I think too much about it I become tearful. I feel guilty about having those feelings. It was minor psychological things,like being blamed by my parents for them arguing .Being described by mother as an awkward baby,child teenager etc . 10 years of boarding school hell because my father wouldn’t switch from working at the Foreign office to work at the Home office. I should’ve been more resilient.
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That is something you learn and how do you learn without a teacher around. Don’t blame yourself.
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To anyone with overwhelming childhood (or other) trauma.
I’ve heard many good things about EMDR therapy.
In fact, I had some myself a few years ago, after having intrusive thoughts to do with the times before and while I was homeless. It helped with those thoughts. (The only trouble was that it was online, and the person who administered it kept switching the picture on the wall behind him, from one session to the next. It kinda freaked me out. (I didn’t have the guts to actually ask him why he kept switching the pictures back and forth, even though it broke my trust in him.))
Anyway, long story short, EMDR can help you not feel so overwhelmed by those memories.
You still remember what happened (it’s not wiped from your mind), but it just doesn’t drag you down so much.
There are also now apps out there - for phones and tablets - where you can administer EMDR to yourself. Some of them are free apps.
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Sounds bad @Jabrown1
But your living independant now?
Just take one day at a time and look after yourself, take care
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The more you feed the evil the more it grows. Nothing sucks it is what it is
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Being on a decent med has helped me to deal with my past better
I dont know if you feel overwhelmed sometimes by remembering stuff but these meds im on now are helping a ton
Ive tried therapies but i just can’t focus enough on therapist so i gave up
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Vortioxetine/brintillix
Excellent anti depressant if youve tried a few already and they havent worked
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I grew up ok. Wore a lot of clothes from goodwill. At one point my parents were fighting but it stopped by the time I grew up so I guess they worked it out. I crawled til about 4 because I had a disability with my foot that I got corrective surgery on. My mom was SA’d but didn’t pass that trauma down to me and got help. my brother had a different dad but he was never around thankfully. My grandmother also had a lot of trauma, for instance her dad would get drunk and chase them around the house with a gun and my great grandfather strangled my great grandmother but none of that ever made it to me.
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Lots of things.