My life use to be crap I had several mentally abusive boyfriends and at least one mentally and physically abusive boyfriend I’ve been homeless for a few months sell my body to get a place to stay for the night and food I’ve also told my story for food… That was actually a nice time… I’ve begged for money online (I used whisper) I usually used it on food since I didn’t get much from that and I gave birth to a daughter after over 30 hours of labor I had a C-section and later lost her to child protective services because I was scared to tell I wasn’t there because I was scared of my now ex boyfriend my daughter was 22 days old when the incident happened and days before that she had gotten out of the NICU because she had jaundice a little over a year after my daughter was taken I tried to end my life and ended up in the hospital for 7 days for dr’s to save my life and then 7 more days in a different hospital for the behavioral health unit I then signed over my rights to my daughter to the state. This isn’t the order everything happened I’m just saying what all I went through
Now I have my disability I met and Married my husband got his disability have an apartment of our own I’m slowly losing weight we have a car I met my daughter after not seeing her for almost 6 years and video chat her about once a month sometimes more I have a good mother in law and nieces and a nephew who try to be good people and life is good… And yet my past haunts me I cry a lot I feel like these things didn’t make me stronger but weak and like I can’t get over all of this I’ve tried but with my daughter’s birthday this month it’s even worse I don’t know what to do anymore I feel stuck I usually end up in the behavioral health unit around this time every year but I’m trying so hard not to I’m depressed I need a shower or bath I need to finish laundry I need to do dishes but I’m doing crafts I’m eating I’m drinking water but I feel worthless I feel bad I want to do things but can’t… I’m just surviving… I want to thrive but can’t seem to
I can’t totally relate but my life is much better as well but sometimes because of my past I feel like a bad person. It’s really hard but sometimes just accepting your feelings lessens them …
I hope you can feel better. Doing crafts and keeping busy is a good idea. Also I read that if you are ruminating on they ‘why’s’ change them to ‘what’s’ go from ‘why did this happen’ to ‘what can i do about it?’
Also exercise is very good for mental health and gets rid of traumatic memories.
@Sacredneigh7 sigh I’m now on 2 antidepressants and with the adding of the second I’m feeling better at least a little
@2Waynez I can’t seem to get balance unless on meds
@fennecfox I crochet and now I’m embroidering I am tired of crochet and doing embroidery I also did a 8 minute workout routine and feeling a little better
i also did something I’ve wanted to do for a while I got a tongue piercing!!! Really happy with it!!!
