Like how much I make, how much my grandparents made, saving money, and investing, being successful so I can retire my family ( too late now because they’re all ready to retire). My siblings and even my parents aren’t like this. I watch hgtv and dream about thde big houses they won in the lottery/ I watch this channel AWE called a wealth of Entertainment that shows these mega million mansions and have friends when i was on instagram with these six figure jobs. I’m not sure where in my life I started to care about this, maybe the creation of social media? The rest of my immediate family doesn’t care. Even more strange I have a twin i’m pretty close to who doesn’t even think about it and we grew up almost the same. A little bit of a different experience but still close. I have a fear of going homeless but i know there’s things like rent assistance and 211. I’m not sure where this comes from. I wasn’t spoiled as a child and even now as an adult. Everyone is receiving help, even from the government. No one is doing it alone. Anyway that’s the end of my rant.
Kinda different but I am obsessed with a budgeting app. Like plan out, to the penny, months in advance.
Tbh it has moved out of prudence into a bit of an issue
Mine started out like this. I used to write down a budget after every paycheck and then it kind of spiraled when i couldn’t keep a job.
It looks like a difficult situation 
Maybe you should take a break with social media and emissions with rich people
Try to find things you’re grateful of in your current life
It’s really stressful to have financial issues I understand why it would have made you spiral
If you have issues ask help,not necessarily money but support
Maybe it would help to have someone listen and give advices when they can when you’re not ok
Dont got to be rich at all, but gotta watch those finances tho… risk of homelessness is real, I’ve been there.. sometimes when we are shooting for the stars we crash land at rock bottom… its best to play it safe, do what you can do easily, and pinch your pennies when you can.